


[On File]

by FeliciaAmelloides



Series: A Oneshot a Day... [196]
Category: nonfandom
Genre: Crack, Idiots on YouTube, M/M, Mail Yourself, People Breaking Into NASA, space travel, stupid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-12
Updated: 2018-07-12
Packaged: 2019-06-11 15:42:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15318753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeliciaAmelloides/pseuds/FeliciaAmelloides
Summary: The document enclosed depicts a recent break in to NASA by two young men in their early twenties, Michael “Mike” Johnson (21) and Nathan “Big Nate” Smith (25). Mr Smith was quickly apprehended, but Mr Johnson’s whereabouts are currently unknown. This document is a transcript of the footage Mr Smith recorded on the day of the break in, and might have some clues as to where Mr Johnson may be.Please store this document on file for future usage while the case is open.





	[On File]

**Author's Note:**

> I love writing crack.

[TRANSCRIPT]

Yo yo yo guys, ‘tis I, the Amazing Mike, coming right atcha with another suuuweeeet video!!!!!

So you’ve probably heard of these ‘mail yourself’ videos where people pretend to mail themselves off to places but never actually do it, right? Well, today I’m gonna do the most EXTREME TOTALLY LEGIT mail yourself video ever! You’re gonna watch _me_ , the Amazing Mike- don’t forget to like and subscribe y’all- attempt to mail _myself_ into...

*dramatic drumroll*

*fanfare* That’s right- SPACE!!!!!!!!

*laugh*, that’s right y’all, the Amazing Mike is gonna be the first dude or lady ever to go into SPACE by mail, don’t forget to like and subscribe guys for more Amazing content just like this I’m Amazing Mike. 

So, first of all we’re gonna go to the store and get some stuff to eat. Now in space they don’t have regular food so we’ll need to get everything in dry packets.

*scene cuts to a supermarket* Yo guys, I am now at the store buying some dry packets for my trip into SPACE, that’s right y’all the Amazing Mike is going to SPACE by mailing myself over there, like and subscribe y’all, turn on that notification belle. So I just bought some dried ice cream and a packet of Cheetos because I think Cheetos will be alright in space, yeah? Totally guys, like and subscribe, follow my Patreon, free Amazing Mike merch at each level.

Okay, now we’re all ready to go into SPACE!!!!! Pause the video and comment on what you think I should do in SPACE! Give it a like and subscribe to my channel while you’re at it for more AMAZING content from Amazing Mike! *laugh* yeah, that’s me y’all, Amazing Mike.

*scene cuts to a launch site for a rocket* Okay y’all, I’m at NASA right now with my mail box ready to fit me inside! For some reason I had to climb loads of spiky walls and dodge lasers to get here, but I guess that’s just space training exercises before we go! I’m so excited you guys, wish me luck by liking and subscribing for more Amazing content, I’m Amazing Mike! Now, we gotta be real quiet because those big men and ladies with shotguns are still after me, but it’ll be okay once we’re on the rocket going into SPACE, that’s right, you heard me ladies and gents, SPACE trip with Amazing Mike like and subscribe y’all. 

So here’s my mail box all set up, there’s the address on the box right there, *points to zoom in of box where the word ‘SPACE’ is written and underlined several times*, can’t wait to do this guys it’ll be so Amazing like and subscribe guys I’m Amazing Mike.

See y’all on the flip side, I’ll text and call ya on my phone! Being closer to the satellites makes signal better, right? *laugh* bye guys, like and subscribe to my Amazing channel for more Amazing content, I’m Amazing Mike. 

*cuts to footage of Mike climbing into the box, then cuts to him being wheeled away*

*cameraman speaks from now on* Haha, guys this is so insane!

*cuts to rocket launching, then shouts of security guards are heard as the camera man starts to run. the footage becomes blurry and distorted before shutting off entirely*

[TRANSCRIPT END]

**Author's Note:**

> Ooh, cliffhanger! Did Amazing Mike make it to space? Is Big Nate alright? And, most importantly, DID YOU LIKE AND SUBSCRIBE TO AMAZING MIKE’S AMAZING CHANNEL FOR MORE AMAZING CONTENT??????
> 
> Like I said: I love writing crack.
> 
> Prompt- Someone tries to mail themselves to space.
> 
> This prompt is seemingly inspired by one of the first comments in a little notebook I keep by bed of all the weird shit I’ve said over the past year and a bit (seriously, it’s all dated and everything)- I mailed myself a cake and it turned into Lucifer!
> 
> I said that when I was flicking through the YouTube recommended videos late at night and saw the title ‘I mailed myself...’. Because I was feeling a bit weird at the time, my brain decided the above was the full title of the video (shockingly, it wasn’t).
> 
> Anyway, please don’t mail yourself. The people on YouTube were all faking, trust me. 
> 
> Original Number- 163.


End file.
